When I am weak, through Christ I am STRONG!

In anticipation of Isaac doing his 3rd grade state required home school testing on Monday, I began to have a private emotional meltdown tonight. I know Isaac’s learning challenges are very much there and he truly is not at the level of the world’s standard of even “average” in academics. It’s a big struggle for him – but I am thankful that most of the time it doesn’t get him down – because God carries Him and because we can school at home in a way that still brings peace and calm to him. These past few weeks I have asked people to cover him in prayer for the upcoming testing. We started practice testing and after 20 minutes he was so tired he had to take a short nap. He has literally been prayed over day by day in preparing him the best we can for doing what is required of us to do. I will praise the Lord once again, for His great works in taking Isaac from struggling with 20 minutes to now being able to handle 2 hours of testing with calm, free from anxiety and the ability to take moments of confusion that would normally end up in a anxiety attack, to be stopped in it’s tracks and him being able to just “move on”.
But tonight, I began to think about all the times others have looked at me, at him, and shook their head or given a look like – “hmmmm” when a noticeable glitch shows up. Most of the time, no one would know that Isaac has processing challenges that indeed go very deep. They are to the point that he would not be able to learn in a regular classroom. He needs one on one assistatnce to help keep him on track – he can lose his way fairly easily, and needs constant reminders and help as to where he is and what he is doing.
The first time I got a look that I will never forget was the night Isaac was born. The doctor who I had been seeing throughout the whole pregnancy but was not on duty the night Isaac was born, came to see me. All I remember is him standing there with arms folded, shaking his head and putting the blame on me. Since then, I have had doctor after doctor look at him with puzzling looks and concerns, as well as many others who have interacted with him .
So what am I emotional about tonight? What kind of look I’m going to get once again, after Isaac’s test taking is over. There is so MUCH behind the emotions I get when the response is what it is from others. But once again, I found my quiet place, which was the bathroom tonight, knelt on the floor, cried out to the Lord and asked him to give me His help and perspective. I felt peace and calm and exited my “sanctuary” and was approached shortly after by Isaac at 8:00 pm asking to draw a picture of a brain. I think this is hilarious and God has a sense of humor. When I asked what prompted this – he said “I just thought of it”. So I got him his paper, and a picture to follow – which he was not able to even draw the outer basic shape it ended up looking like a triangle and I showed him how to trace the shape instead and he filled in the details on his own. One thing followed another, next was his unusal intrigue with a a geography book, followed by a book about the earth and volcanoes, followed by a request to do a deeper study on the topic.
This once again astounded me because this is NOT everyday for him-he’s so random….the way one moment something turns on and he is SO engaged and focused is so fascinating to me -it just goes so deep for him when he’s in that place – the Lord just never ceases to amaze and surprise me with this kid – the way he works is just so out of the “normal” – and I LOVE it and LOVE him!
God is so faithful because everytime I begin to worry and take it to Him in prayer He will bless me in the most unexpected ways.
I’ve been connecting with other moms with stroke survivor kiddos – they rejoice at EVERY small, yet SO BIG achievements in a way that is different for our other children – I think because when you have a kid that you know God has literally spared and chosen to live with challenges in a WORLD that sees the the “disabilities” as a deficit – yet we can see the the amazing strength and perserverance in them that is SO not a deficit – BUT A rather an ABILITY to display God’s power, a rich lesson to teach the world and what truly matters -allowing God to use the weak to show His strength and a spiritual perspective that is based on heavenly and not earthly standards!
So testing on Monday…. I believe in God, I hope in God, and trust in God – and I will stand confident in the work God continues to do in Isaac’s life, in my life, in the life of our whole family. We live for Christ alone, we are not of this world, but are pulled out of this world and it’s thinking – God is bigger, greater, higher, than what we can see with our own eyes – His idea of life and what really matters is is far beyond our comprehension. But I do believe he uses the weak to show His power –
For God says: “My grace is sufficient for you, for MY power is made perfect in weakness” There fore I, Leah, Isaac (all God’s children) may boast in my weaknesses that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake I delight in hardships, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12: 9 & 10

HOPE IN HIM ALONE

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your path” Prov. 3 : 5 & 6

Pillow is wet as I lay down to sleep,
The presence of the Father right
there with me.

With sweet rest He did bless me
I awoke free of my anxiety.

Like Moses that led his people to
lands unknown
We too, will lead our family in faith knowing we are not alone.

God will provide along the way
Leading us through – we will seek, trust and obey.

For we have seen His provision in times past,
again and again
We have seen His GREAT works
We believe not in ourselves but simply in HIM!

As we wait not knowing what to expect
We are reminded our expectation lies not in us,
not what is seen  ~

For we walk by faith – not by sight
not in our understanding but in the POWER of His MIGHT!

For our souls wait silently for God for the unknown,

for our expectation is HIM alone (Psalm 62:5)

In the dessert ahead and unknown to us
To Him it is known and it is for us to trust

And now Lord what do I wait for? Our Hope
is in YOU” (Psalm 39:7)

God Sent Me A Knight

For HE shall give His angels charge over you to guard you in all your ways… Psalm 91:11

Once upon a time, a fairly long time ago there lived a damsel in great distress. Her heart ached and longed for true love. She was a confused young miss, imprisoned by disappointing circumstances around here. Her heart bled and she desperately desired to be rescued. She prayed and prayed. She prayed to the King Most High in Heaven and asked Him to send help. And she waited. And she waited some more…
Then one day the King summoned one of His finest in His army to go. The King said, “ I am sending you because you are one of my best. Go to her and find her. Touch her heart, show her My true and unconditional love. Take her, capture her, hold her tight and never let her go.”
So as a faithful knight would do, he followed the orders of the King and he went to look for this imprisoned captive. And as the young girl waited, she continued to hold onto hope even as she felt her life gradually slipping away.
So it was, the King led His knight directly to her and he quickly captured her heart. Then the Lord of Heaven instructed him to keep her by his side all the days of his life, to protect and guard her. And the knight did!
Years went by and they grew in love for one another. They faced adventures and journeys together. Because they were now joined together as one, they would fight their Lord’s battles together. The two of them together, were a part of the great commission of the Mighty Army of the Lord. They faced many battles together. Their Great Leader equipped them with just the perfect armor each and every time to win each and every battle.
And so, this once lost and hurting young girl lived under the guidance of the King with her Knight In Shining Armor right by her side. And every day her heart was now filled and overflowing with gratitude to her King for sending the best of his men to capture and rescue her heart.
The two of them together live on, training their young lads to be a part of this great army. So that one day they, too, grow up to be Knights In Shining Armor under the commandment of their King Most High. One day, they too, will capture the heart of a young miss and continue the legacy of the Greatest love and the great commission of the King Most High.