A MOTHER’S PRAYER IN THE MIDNIGHT HOURS

7-woman-at-jesus-feetI find myself in almost a constant state of prayer over my children’s lives. Prayer of thanksgiving for this season of life God has bestowed upon me as a gift. Thanksgiving in that He would entrust me with HIS precious children, that in all my weakness, He would choose me to be apart of HIS great sovereign plan in these lives.

 

Also find myself, with prayers of pleas without ceasing for every worry, burden, anxiety,  and desires of my heart for Christ’s work to abound and not my own. Afterall how can a sinner, raise a sinner into knowing and loving Christ?  It is no longer I who live, but Christ Who lives in me!  Pointing them to Jesus, pointing them to the gospel, and living it out.  Each dying to myself, and being resurrected again and again by Christ’s power. In my own repentance, submission, obedience, and pressing on in faith.  For I am weak, but in my weakness, He is strong. He reminds me that He knows all about these children. He loves them in a way I never could in my human weakness. He reminds me HE is not only shaping their but rather, continuing to shape my life as well into His completeness.

 

 

“Dear Holy Lord, may I trust in YOUR perfect love to finish the work YOU began in my life and the lives of these children. May I die to wisdom of this world, and rely on wisdom from above. May I never lose heart, and may Your HOLY Spirit constantly be about me reminding me that this life is only pointing to the eternal life in Heaven with You. May the worrisome, burdens that linger about me, daily be left at the foot of the cross of Love, as I am resurrected daily by the Power of the grave you conquered. May I thank you, even in storms, for the work you are doing even when I can’t see, because I walk by faith and not by sight. May I remember in the toughest days that do not make any sense, that YOUR ways and my finite understanding JUST cannot be compared. May I take comfort in the fact that Jesus is always interceding for us, that YOU will never leave us or forsake us, and find hope that your immeasurable truth and love that is at work constantly will bring us into eternity with YOU.” In Jesus Name, Amen

 

FAITH, HOPE, LOVE – THE GREATEST OF THESE IS LOVE

 

For this reason I kneel before the Father,  from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name.  I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being,  so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,  may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ,  and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,  to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.  Eph. 3:14-21

Raising Boys – God’s Mighty Warriors~ (my story)

101_8884Yesterday the boys and I (and dog) headed out for a walk through the neighborhood. Me feeling exhausted and looking forward to a relaxing break from school work. Maximus carried a blow up sword he had received for his birthday. Shortly out on our adventure all chaos broke-commotion from every direction. Dogs across in the fenced yard yapping, ladies across the street yelling at their little dog to get back (that was loose) , and Isaac trying to hold Harry back from the loose dog (Harry is anti social -LOL!)All the sudden realize a big yellow school bus was coming up behind and I had mama illusions of someone darting to the middle of the street (mostly Isaac). All the while…Maximus was standing in front of us waving his big sword at the “little” dog that kept following us having a little mini moment of Knight In Shining Armor. In my moment of OH MY GOODNESS THIS IS TOO MUCH… I grabbed Harry’s leash from Isaac, and instructed Maximus to “get over here now”. I started to tell him how waving at the little dog was not what he should have been doing then….. I… stopped…. and I do believe it was the Holy Spirit…. then I said in a calm, humble, gentle voice, “you know what buddy, I am SO SORRY. God made you to be a WARRIOR, A PROTECTOR, and THAT is exactly what you were doing. You did nothing wrong.. you were doing exactly what God created you to do-will YOU please forgive me?” And of course those handsome, warrior, brown eyes looked up at me and said – “it’s okay, mom, I forgive you”. And we walked down the road hand in hand. I am thankful for God’s promptings, and I pray for MANY more of those along this way – in showing me my errors, showing me His perspective, and helping me to build the healthy relationships He desires of me with God’s Mighty Warriors!

Hello Textbooks, Hello Tears, Hello JESUS!!!!!!!

101_8863Our first day of Fall school with our new textbooks and games. Started out rough (for me), time for a break. I leaned hard on Jesus and cried out to Him, with tears streaming down my face. Wisdom He did give! Joy! He is so faithful!
There are times in this journey including today where I become overwhelmed and in a moment can “wonder-how can I do this?”- I give HIM the desire of my heart – to continue to find joy, and peace, and wisdom in this process. HE continues to give me the desire of my heart! “Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:4

Beauty today in….
A quick turnaround in attitudes
Realizing how much school the boys can do together now (similar levels – learning together)
Sucessful strategies in how to make math happen one on one
Apologies made from the heart
Forgiveness
Home made targets make a great break from math problems
A Walk holding my 9 year olds hand (covered in a black super hero glove)
A purple flower picked for “me”
Mother and son sweet conversation

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Where Was Jesus?

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“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.  2 Cor. 9 & 10

WHERE WAS JESUS? -August 29th, will always be a day of reflection for me….as well as the weeks to follow…. Yes, it is Isaac’s birthday, it is so much MORE than that for me. Each year I pray for the LORD to give me one more WAY to share HIM through this experience. Today I write: WHERE WAS JESUS? Well you see, from the moment the team of white coats hovered over us with the ABRASIVE news that we would not be going home “tonight”, but rather rushing to the operating room… somehow, by God’s grace my FOCUS went to survival which meant JESUS!

God had been working on me for many years on this TRUST thing. Showing me that focusing on HIM and reliance on HIM is where I found peace. Early in our marriage we said “IF” we ever have children and have a son, we would call him “ISAAC”. But God had us WAIT, WAIT, WAIT AND …… WAIT… through all these years of waiting, the ONLY way I found peace was through daily submitting my will to the Father’s, believing He could do all things, and trust He had my best interest in mind. I yearned with every heart string within me to be a mama – He said… TRUST ME. These years were rich in spending much time in HIS WORD, prayer, and growing in my relationship with my Savior. It prepared me for August 29, 2002 – the team of white coats came in….

WHERE WAS JESUS? At the forefront of my mind. Everywhere and all around. As they whisked me quickly away from my husband, I did not hold back, there was no hesitation, it was automatic reaction, and I was not afraid of offending anyone or worrying what anyone thought. I needed JESUS, and I said out loud “get on that phone, and call other’s to pray – we need people praying”.
JESUS was with us…
1) Jesus was with us when I entered the operating room, my worried husband left on the other side of the cold metal doors, my whole body shaking yet my emotions stayed calm. God took me back to 12 years of age, when I was having a heart catherization performed and I had memorized Psalm 23 to speak and bring comfort. This night. again, I began quoting Psalm 23, and then a gentle voice that seemed so angelic and supernatural but was a nurse over my head said: “Leah everything is going to be okay”. PEACE – peace that surpasses all understanding came over me-INDESCRIBABLE!
2)Jesus was with us when Isaac was ambulanced 30 miles away and there was no room for me… I said out loud: “I will pray for a room” another nurse by my side said.. “can I pray with you?” and we did. Hours later I was across the hall from the NICU.
3)Jesus was with us when we prayed with a Godly couple for our son, submitting our will to the Father’s will, asking for healing, and trusting in Him.
4)Jesus was with us when the doctors informed us 24 hours into his life that your baby is sick and do not know if he will pull through and live…. I wept, I prayed, I read my bible… PEACE Jesus brought that surpasses all understanding that guarded my heart and mind.
5)Jesus was with us when 3 days into his life when he was beginning to breathe more on his own…as we sat in the NICU by his side and the doctors said it looks like your baby is going to live… Jesus was with us as we acknowledged His presence and the honor due HIS name, as we spoke out loud “Praise the LORD”.
6) Jesus was with us as we sang “Jesus loves me” out loud daily, over our son in the NICU.
7)Jesus was with me when I sat at home empty handed, overwhelmed and crying that my baby was so far away… when a song was placed in my hands….. “I will carry you to Jesus”. Comfort to my soul.
8)Jesus was with us after 16 days in the NICU when I feared taking him home after the nurse was still not showing great confidence in his level of or lack of interest in eating… and my husband stepped in and became the STRENGTH that I needed as I became weary.
9)Jesus was with us, in every card, every letter, every meal, every gift, every prayer, every touch, and so much more that was extended to our family.
10)and Jesus was with Isaac the times we were apart, when he was struggling inside me, when God breathed life back into his weak body and made him strong, and Jesus is still with Him today in all things!

And I reflect…. WHERE WAS JESUS? When…I was dead in my sins? HE was on that cross, arms stretched out wide, dying for me, for my sins, God breathed life back into Him, so I could have LIFE IN HIM! “so what can I say? what can I do? but offer this heart oh God completely to you… I’ll stand with arms high and heart abandoned in awe of the ONE who gave it all, I’ll stand to You Lord my soul surrendered all I am is yours” FOCUS INTENTLY ON JESUS!

“Jesus loves me this I know for the bible tells me so, little ones to Him belong, we are WEAK, but HE IS STRONG”

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Our son is 12 years old today.  2 months ago he saw the neurologist, who showed with testing that Isaac’s left side is still weak and the brain is not transmitting messages properly due to his stroke at birth.

Yet because God delights to show His power in weakness… he continues to learn much, and in a mystery of the Lord, while Isaac is told he is weak – yet he is demonstrating strength mighty.  It really doesn’t make sense… because IT IS GOD!  The LORD is using the “weakness” that is medically there, to show even Isaac that someone in him is giving him ability that is not of himself.

“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,  to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! ” Amen

Due to the stroke, connections in all of life have been pushed down.  Helping those relational connections come to life and be real, one of my hugest prayers (of MANY)… as I yearn for him to relate with the Savior.

We SEE how God is using the weakness to demonstrate the REALNESS of our GOD to our own son, as he marvels that was easy and that used to be so painfully difficult – whoa! Making those connections little by little for hope deep relationship he will have one day…. and even recently with new ways, God is doing much. JESUS is WITH US – HIS SPIRIT AT WORK… and here is our story:

Joys of our Boys! Puzzle “ING” VICTORY! and Fruit Salad is Served!

101_8851It was a guys afternoon out for dinner and the river when Joe arrived home from work to our 95 degree scorcher of a day.   Isaac came home excited about his new 30 piece puzzle he received in his kids meal.  Unusual for him to be excited about a puzzle.  Puzzles have always left him more than “PUZZLED” and a very difficult thinking task for him.    He has only attempted puzzles when I have sat him down to “try”.  Usually needing assistance from little bro.

Well last night, for whatever reason, he was different.  He could not wait to dig in!  Quietly I left him in his room for a solid hour.  And then, he came out.  With a huge smile of satisfaction on his face, content as can be, ready to show me what he did.  “it was hard mom, really hard.  I even went to see if Max could help me, but he was already asleep, so I just kept going, and I figured it out all by myself”  VICTORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

P.S. – Kids and babies have strokes – Isaac Sellars – Alive & Kickn’ & Thriving

“Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, be glory, honor, forever and ever!  Amen”  Eph 3:20

AND….. THIS LEADS US TO FRUIT SALAD!

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Good morning from God!  My little bundle of love from above – full of the Joy of the Lord’s strength daily.  Been on a fruit salad kick.  Served up his mama, fresh fruit salad to start our morning off right!  ~Fruit Salad is Served ~ by Sir Maximus the Chef

“this is the day the Lord has made, we will rejoice and be glad in it”  Psalm 118:24

School Is In the House!

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School for Wild n’ Crazy Sellars boys! Back to school photo with no shirts on!!

We received our shipments today.  Imagine God’s timing… 3 packages coming from three different places arriving on the same day!

God is good!  Every hour I need Him.  Scratch that – every second I need Him!

Lessons I learned over our summer break:

1)summer breaks are important in this season of schooling – mostly for “mom” – but then really for my marriage, for my children to have a more well prepared and adjusted mom, teacher, advocate, coach, cheerleader, and so on…  So really the break is vital for all of us!

2)Pacing myself for the race God has called me to is wisdom gleaned from Above.

3)Rest, Being still in the Lord, brings strength and vitality over and over again, necessary for the battles to come!

“grow in the GRACE and KNOWLEDGE of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ”  1 Pet 5:18

101_8835101_8838A binder loaded with goodies – animal life, God’s creation, EVEN a $ score from Target for a Reading Comprehension book about African Animals!

 

 

 

And… Isaac was loaded up with a binder full of goodies – sports theme, some fun books from $ store, as well as this ZANY TALES (mock off MAD Libs) for engaging my silly boy with silly stories to learn his parts of speech.

“Fall” ing – in LOVE with Our Home School Kick off to 3rd and 5th Grade!

101_8738Considering I was out of sorts as this day begun – it was a day of “Fall” ing  in love with the goodness of my Savior in His rich, rich blessings in my life!

Home school today was rich in…..

1)Worship in the car to Blessed Be Your Name, and Overcomer!  Singing and rockin’ and movin’ and groovin’ as we headed out to Molalla, Oregon

2)Practicing our memory verse as we drove down the road “Always be joyful, never stop praying, be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”  1 Thess. 5:16-18

3)An inspiring visit to an Elk Farm owned by fellow Christian Home Schoolers, with a beautiful tour given by a well spoken young lady.

4)Hands on learning, sight seeing, God’s beautiful creation – Isaac was brave & caught a chicken and asserted himself with his own question… why do the elk wear tags?  Maximus was in his wildlife zone!!!

5)Fellowship time with some wonderful inspiring home school mama’s and their children

6)pure, beautiful, glowing sunshine

7)I Praise God I can say today once again – I am  an “OVERCOMER” because…. I was….

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“Staring at a stop sign

Watching people drive by
T Mac on the radio
Got so much on (my)your mind
Nothing’s really going right
Looking for a ray of hope

Whatever it is you may be going through
I know He’s not gonna let it get the best of you

You’re an overcomer
Stay in the fight ‘til the final round
You’re not going under
‘Cause God is holding you right now
You might be down for a moment
Feeling like it’s hopeless
That’s when He reminds You
That you’re an overcomer

Everybody’s been down
Hit the bottom, hit the ground
Oh, you’re not alone
Just take a breath, don’t forget
Hang on to His promises
He wants You to know

The same Man, the Great I am
The one who overcame death
Is living inside of You
So just hold tight, fix your eyes
On the one who holds your life
There’s nothing He can’t do
He’s telling You….

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