Home Schooling, educating, discipling. A wife, a mother. Who shall I minister to today? Who will I cross paths with? My husband and children in the heart of our home. We do not have to go far to be sharing the love of Jesus. To be serving and caring, and discipling for the kingdom of God.
They are 10 and 12. And there have been days, seasons, of weariness, moments of doubt. And yet conviction that this is our call for our family that has carried us on. Many days of holding it together and sneaking away multiple times in a day to burst into cries before the Lord. In His faithfulness He has picked me up in an instant and carried me onward… a child that has been a mystery to unravel. A walking of faith, not by sight. Two precious gifts. That God has used to enhance my life, my marriage, and relationship with Him. That has caused me to view the kingdom of God as the focus of our lives as the only thing that truly matters in the end.
Days of joy!! Victories! And yes… many days where I will be honest I could barely move. A bible in one hand asking God to speak to me minute by minute as I ministered to my son asking the Lord to give me what I needed to reach inside his unseen and hidden world and bring him out.
“don’t grow weary in doing good – you will reap a harvest if you do not lose heart” Gal.
Who am I to think I shouldn’t have to walk this road-let go of this or be refined like this? Apostle Paul was filled with such passion and counted it all joy. Rather I stand GRATEFUL for the road I have been given to walk. In it all it has increased my trust and faith in a God so mighty.
I consider Apostle Paul, He knew what it was like to be without Christ as Lord. And He knew all He had in Christ and what He had done for him. And he yearned desperately for the growth of his spiritual children. He was willing to go all the way in torture and pain and ridicule for the sake of enhancing lives with the gospel.
I am blessed with the life God has given me. I too know what I had without Christ in my life- emptiness and misery. And I know what victory I have had because of Christ in me!
The LORD has used His word written through the vessel of Apostle Paul to minster to me. My onward call. Paul a spiritual father to many, and deep love so deep for his spiritual children. Determined to press on in discipling them all the way. Encouraged by his joy of remaining in seasons so difficult because his love and dedication to the progress of his beloved sons in Christ was so profound to his heart of hearts.
While writing from prison and much suffering and yearning to be out of this place and in heaven, he said: “Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith, so that through my being with you, for your JOY in Christ Jesus will overflow..” Phil. 1:25
As John MacCarthur stated: This was Paul’s conviction–not a supernatural revelation–he saw their need and saw the need for him to remain with them on this earth longer. “Progress” pictures the trail blazing so that an army can advance. Paul wanted to cut a new path for the Phillipians to follow to victory!
What word to consider. In raising up our children, discipling them with the desire for their continued spiritual progress that leads them on to true victory… how I am motivated to consider this SEASON where I am called to be stretched and die to self for the sake of the kingdom. The days when God has truly called me to press on, may I REMAIN present in my heart of hearts and mind and soul in this place of pressing on with the gospel and CONTINUING ON WITH FULL COMMITMENT “Never lacking in zeal, but keeping spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.” Rom. 12:11