It was not so long ago that big brother would not be able to do this with ease. Anxiety and frustration from so many forces coming at him made it great effort to sustain self control and proper use of tone of voice, patience, empathy. We have used our home as a training ground taking seriously Deut. 6 which tells us to diligently teach our children morning, noon, and night the scriptures. Repetitively, throughout the day, in all situations. God’s word, prayerfully, considering the scenarios He gives us in a day to use opportunities to build connections in relationships with one another, pointing to relationship with God.
I marvel when I see him now and how far God has taken him just in the past 6 months something huge has happened. The ability to sit with his little brother and patiently teach him a new game. Today in calm demeanor he taught his younger brother the game. I am still teaching him, as I encouraged him as well as led him to even more God has for him.
Working on empathy for the other. Sharing how God tells us to not just look out for our own interest but the interest of another. Showing him how it feels to be new at something. Showing him how it feels to be the one who has worked hard at the new and has lost the game. Considering what words would encourage. We need encouragement, so do others. Showing him that he has the power (God’s power) within him to make someone else feel loved. His words to his little brother is a huge example of that.
While often he still matter of factly trusts our words and God’s word and does as he logically knows he should, his neurological glitches don’t make the genuine empathy just come naturally. I trust as we matter of factly show him the way, God will supernaturally give all the ability he needs to interact in healthy relationships. It is coming. IT takes time. Us mama’s need extra patience beyond patience to wait for God to do what He can only do. It shapes us women into who God is wanting us to be. He uses our children to mold us, increase our faith, and draw us nearer to Him. The best place any of us could ever be.
Ultimately we plant, and we plant, and water and water, and do not grow weary in doing good… for… “then neither he who plants is anything, nor he who waters, but God who gives the increase.” 1 Cor. 3:7 It is us parents who plant and water but God is the ONE what makes it all happen by His power and His spirit, His way, and His time. For when we do not grow weary in doing good… for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up – Galatians 6:9
To God be the GLORY!!!
I know our situation is not the same as yours in the parenting realm, but “amen” to the patience needed:) The Lord reminded me the other day that He would perfect those things that concerned my kids. That brought me great comfort:)
Tricia, I know there is always a common element in parenting/mothering our children. While the parenting “realm” may be different in dynamics, etc… even still – yes, yes, from one mother to another – patience is something I know all us moms need! Amen Sister.