Isaac started Karate 2 years ago. It has been a blessing to his life. I always saw the physical strength in him. I saw how he desired to use it any way he could. Not always practical. I say that with humor. A work in progress. At 9 months, he did start walking. He wanted to go. His left leg definitely quivered as he went.
Learning to ride a bike was very difficult. Physically and emotionally. I was determined to find a way to help him achieve. WE took small increments. And lots of prayer and pep talks. Even when he achieved balance and could ride along well, in an instant his world went crashing down on him when his left leg slipped off the pedal and he physically and emotionally crashed. Again, and again. I’d pick him up, dust him off, speak God’s truth to him, tell him to never give up. And so on…
Karate has been an outlet for Isaac to use his love of structure, hyper focus on a physical activity. And the desire to move up for reward after reward. Something I always saw in him was a great desire to have goals set out that he could achieve. Knowing there would be yet another.
The other day Isaac began working on a new kick. It required a LOT of control. He was executing it well on his right-with all his might keeping himself tucked in strong with arms and hands. I asked him to show me the left. He hesitated, with tears in his eyes. I knew something was up because that rarely happens. He did not want to do the left at all. He began to explain, how it felt so strangely, and awfully out of control. He has never expressed this in any of his other kicks, moves to this degree. He WAS feeling cerebral palsy in his physical in a way he hadn’t identified or recognized before.
We prayed. I encouraged. And reminded him of God’s love for him. That even when it “feels” out of control to him, the truth is God is fully in control. It’s okay. Focusing on the strengths. Reminding him the call to Believers to persevere. That difficulty produces, character, and hope that does not disappoint because the LOVE OF GOD HAS BEEN POURED OUT INTO OUR HEARTS THROUGH THE HOLY SPIRIT.
Yesterday I was out for a bit. I came home and in a casual conversation, Isaac brought up that he worked on his kicks. He had a gigantic smile on his face. He told me that he worked on the left side, and something happened. He no longer felt out of control. He said it was so strange because the out of control feeling that was so prominent, now was gone and this in control feeling reigned and ruled. “let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts…and be thankful.” Col. 3:15
Whether Isaac’s kick has truly improved I am not sure. It seems however, that God has gotten ahold of his heart, mind, and soul. Given Isaac a special touch. A peace knowing He is in control always, even when life doesn’t feel that.
What I do know, is God has a plan very special for every life. Academics, processing information, verbally, paper, and more have been grueling for him. Relational connections, understanding emotions of his own and others – grueling to achieve. But nothing is impossible with God! And He indeed does more than we could ever imagine. He has indeed overcome much in all these areas of living daily.
I have to always go back to the beginning when Isaac was “dead” and placed on a ventilator at birth. He could do nothing. It was God’s gracious hand that chose to raise Isaac up to life. And because of this, we have had the privilege to point he and his brother to Jesus each and every day. Jesus whose death on the cross, and overcoming and raising to life – gives us life.
Not only does Isaac understand it was God who raised him to life in the NICU. He understands it is He Who helps him everyday. He understands his need for help. He understands his need for a Savior to save him from his sins. He understands, this God loved him so much that He gave His only Son-Jesus to die for his sins and offer forgiveness and everlasting life.
He understands once again, as many other things in life have felt pretty out of control, and then one day, all of a sudden it FEELS so very different and amazing… that is GOD! God’s power made perfect in weakness. He understands that is awesome and that is why he told me “yes mom when I felt like I was no longer out of control I said, thank you God”.
And that is why Isaac has said, I can share this with you today. He knows that sharing is pointing to Jesus. The One Who is his help everyday, and can be yours too!
